How to Stay Strong & Not Conform
Have you found yourself in social situations where people pressure you to indulge in calories that aren’t part of your health plan? If yes, then keep reading because this post is for you!
Recently, I had a female client tell me she was with a group of women she had just met who gave her a hard time about refusing to order dessert. Even though my client explained to them she was following a health plan, they continued to badger her, giving her every reason they could think of that it was o.k. to indulge along with them.
I, myself, recently attended a party where others were pressuring me to have alcohol and treats I didn’t want. It was almost as if the more disciplined I was, the harder they pressured me to partake.
It’s a shame, but there’s a lot of evidence that suggests many people in this world want to bring you down. Often, those who don’t have a game plan (especially in regards to their health), unconsciously want to sabotage your program.
I guess it comes down to the old adage, “Misery loves company.” Is it because these people don’t want to feel alone in being lost without a goal to work towards?
In any case, their lifestyle and lack of goals aren’t YOURS. At the end of any social situation, you have to go home with the calories you consumed – and deal with the consequences. Not only will you be fighting feelings of guilt but it`ll be that much harder and longer to reach your goals.
If you stay strong and focused, when the party is over, it`ll be SO much more satisfying for you if you remember how strong you were. Trust me, the feeling of triumph of overcoming peer pressure will be much sweeter than that cake!
Another personal training client of mine, this one male, explained to me how he felt compelled to order the same alcoholic drink as his client (or potential client) in business luncheons and dinners. He reasoned that he didn’t want his clients to drink alone; he felt that by drinking with them, he would connect with them on a certain level, form a stronger bond and solidify the relationship.
However, I argued that if you show discipline and leadership with clients and potential clients, they will respect you more. Someone who shows mental strength and willpower scores high in most people`s books, and they will most likely want to do business with you more!
Tips to Stay Strong in Social Situations
If you ever find yourself in any of the social situations described above where others won`t accept your simple “no,” try telling them that you haven`t earned that treat yet. Inform them that you still have three more workouts (or however many you have left in the week) before you can indulge without compromising your program.
By standing up for yourself and your goals, it will earn you the respect of those around you, as well as your own respect for yourself!
If you find your non-conformity strength is a little flabby, just tell the group you have an allergy. Yes, it`s a little white lie but it`ll benefit you because you`ll find everyone will back right off. For some reason, people take it more seriously if there`s potential of an immediate negative consequence of an allergic reaction rather than a long-term negative consequence of failing to live up to a dietary goal.
This second suggestion makes it a little easier for you to say, “no.” But we urge you to strengthen your leadership qualities little by little. You`ll notice non-conformists have a very firm “no,” a confidence behind their answer. If you`re firm enough, people don`t even bother to persuade you in the opposite direction. If you`re even a little unsure of yourself, they sense this and will keep trying to convince you to conform.
To sum up this blog post, always keep in mind your health goals and BIG why you want to be healthier. When you do this and are confident you`re on the right path, you can practice standing up for yourself, maintaining your discipline and being a leader. The more you do this, the more you will like AND respect yourself, which means you won`t care about what others think of you. Funny enough, people generally like and respect those who are true to themselves and don`t conform!
Do you have any tips for people to stay strong and not conform?